Pain.

Kids all around the world are experiencing worldly situations you can't imagine happening to you every day. Some worse than others, without a doubt, but every one feels like what they are going through is the worst thing any human could ever experience. We feel this way because we only experience what we experience. No one's pain is any less than someone else's. All pain is equal. My pain can sometimes feel unbearable. Late nights, fighting, and crying myself to sleep is my norm.

If I could describe my life in one word, I would use broken. Everything is out of place. My emotions, thoughts, family, school, friendships, and more. Living a day in my life would feel like hell to someone in my opinion. I'm more of a standoff person when it comes to my feelings. I don't like to share my feelings with anyone because I feel no one could ever understand how I feel. Only a few people i'm close to know what I truly go through, but none of them fully understand how I feel about it. When I try to talk about my feelings or even just think about them, my eyes become blurry. I become blind from tears when I try to open up to someone.

I always try to find an escape from the stress and pain. I have only one, true escape. That escape is church. It's the only thing I leave the house for. My house is like a prison. All criminals want to do in prison is get out because they are miserable. Recently, it seems like all I ever want to do is get out. Mentally, I am a strong person. I can hold my own and fight for myself. I never need anyone else to back me up in a situation. I'm independent.

One of the biggest pains for me is being home only because of what goes on inside these walls which no one could ever understand. A strong second would be losing someone who knew everything about you because you messed up. I lost my best friend two months ago, because we got in a stupid argument. We understood each other like no one else could. I was in the wrong and I apologized several times. It breaks my heart knowing I think about her everyday, but my name hasn't popped up in her mind in two months. I break down looking at the pictures of us. I laugh and then cry when I watch the funny videos. We did everything together. She's all my memories within three years. I'd do anything to have her back, but it's been two months. We've argued before, but it lasted three days maximum.

All of my other friends don't like her which makes it even harder to grieve to someone about it, so i'm forced to act like I don't care about her. When in reality, I love her with everything in me.

Everyone goes through pain. Pain comes frequently and we can't control it. It's okay to be sad. It's okay to grieve. Find someone you can grieve to. Talk to your parents, friends, or anyone close to you. I can't go to my parents, and I choose not to go to my friends because they simply won't understand. So I came here, to all of you. I may not know your names, but I know someone is listening and that's all I need. Remember pain will always come, but so will happiness.